Tuesday, June 26

Should punishments fit the crime?

There's a subtle controversy between Domestic Discipline couples over what types of punishments to administer, and what not to administer. I personally believe in alternative punishment. I've always been one of those punishment-fits-the-crime type of people, and I'm sure there are many others who can agree with me. That being said, I should probably elaborate on what I mean by alternative punishment.

Most people, when they hear "corporal punishment", think of open handed spanking, paddling, or belting. True, these are effective methods of discipline, but why be limited to only one successful technique? Different types of punishments work for different couples, and yes, sometimes spanking and corner time as the only punishments used can be beneficial in several circumstances. How about the wives that always seem to go back to disobedient and destructive behavior after numerous trips over the knee, and no matter how often they get maintenance spankings? Can spankings alone still be relied on to keep a wife safe and obeying her Husband's rules, when they have turned to nothing but cycle after vicious cycle? Spankings, are in a sense, temporary, but they are still meant to leave a lasting impression to some extent. When is it time to look to other options? That is solely up to the Head of Household to decide, as with all family decisions. If he decides that spanking is simply not enough, he may look to something more lasting that can thoroughly, and safely, teach a lesson. Of course I can't make that choice myself, or define when "enough is enough" but I can provide ideas and advice.

 I separate alternative offenses into two categories, which would be verbal and juvenile. Some offenses may or may not be rule breakers for different couples, but in general these are considered rule breakers for most DD marriages.


* Lying
* Talking back, negative attitude, "mouthing off"
* Swearing excessively
* Giving out personal information or secrets about the HOH without permission
* Flirting or saying inappropriate things to other men

Those are only a few examples I thought of, but as you see they are all related because they are verbal. What's usually done to clean up a dirty mouth? You might be thinking "chewing Orbit gum." Not exactly.

 A good old fashioned mouth soaping works wonders. Now, I know mouth soaping can also fit into childish punishments, which I will get into briefly, but as a rule of thumb most will agree that mouth soaping when done to children is a punishment for swearing, lying, or another verbal offense, right? The point made is that all dirty language and dishonesty will be punished, and your spouse will fully comprehend that with a mouth soaping. No one likes the taste of soap. The best part about this is in most cases, swearing and flirting are most often considered minor punishable acts paired with a minor punishment. Although in some more serious cases, such as lying, you might need to accompany mouth soaping with a big spanking or long term grounding.

Now the question comes down to, what type of soap to use? Answers vary from house to house. Dish soap usually isn't recommended, and of course shampoos and detergents are definite DON'Ts, but that's a given. The best type of soap to use for lathering the mouth would have to be a sudsy, generic brand bar soap or at the very least a mild hand soap. The bar soap is the most common type because it can be held and lathered around in the child's (or in this case woman's) mouth at ease by the HOH. Hand soap can work too but it has to be sure that the wife holds it in her mouth for the determined length of time. 5-10 minutes of soap in the mouth is enough and afterwards needs to be rinsed out thoroughly with water.


* Temper tantrums
* Crying when things don't go her way
* Acting out in public or arguing loudly with the HOH in public
* Repeatedly neglecting to clean up after herself
* Starting quarrels or fights with anyone (defending herself does not count)

These are all childish behaviors that even adults take part in. Would your wife not benefit from having those behaviors corrected? If someone acts like a child, they should be called for their actions and treated as how they have been acting to get the point across, instead of just a corporal punishment used for everyday purposes. What childish punishments should be fit to childish behaviors? Some of my suggestions are:

* Grounding
* Time out, corner time or bedroom time if those aren't already employed
* Loss of privileges
* Extra chores
* Enema
* Diaper position spanking (the spankee lays on the edge of a bed or other flat surface, legs are lifted by the spanker to expose the bottom, and the bottom is swatted by the spanker standing up on the floor)

Since I listed an enema as a possible punishment, I want to add that it should NEVER be done using cold or hot water, too much soap, or too large of a volume. I know enemas are a controversial and old fashioned method of domestic discipline, but if done in the right way (a safe way) enemas can be harmless and convincing. These are usually done with enema bags (aka hot water bottles) that hold up to a gallon of solution, a thin hose and nozzle, and warm water. Salt and baking soda can be added to the enema to keep it balanced with the colon's natural state. If you choose to use soap, use a very mild soap and only enough to form a few suds on the surface. Make sure to administer a second enema containing the same or slightly larger volume than the first with water only to rinse out any soap leftover and prevent irritation. I recommend not using any cramp-inducing solutions like cold water or sodium phosphate. An enema in itself is embarrassing, uncomfortable and meant to leave a lasting impression, which is why it is an effective punishment but must be done with caution. For the first time, try to use up to a quart of water at the most, and once you and your spouse are familiar with enema use move it up to 2-3 quarts each time. The one receiving the enema should hold it for a few minutes and expel the contents in the toilet with the disciplinarian watching.

Again, this is all up to the HOH and what he chooses as punishments to fit misbehavior. I wish you all the best and I hope you take into consideration these alternative punishments in your marriage.


  1. An alternative to soap in an enema is lemon juice, which is non-poisonous. But there are other posibilities, such as having to hold a penny with the nose against a mirror (no nose prints or breath marks allowed), punative chores (cleaning the bathroom with a tooth brush) or written punishments (letters of confession, writing lines etc.)

    An effective method of mouth soaping is for the culprit to have to chew a small, previously softened with warm water bar of mild soap, of the size found in motel bathrooms. Liquid soaps as detergents, as you mention, are never to be used: liquid soaps contain perfumes and other noxious chemicals; detergent is poisonous

    1. Suppositories or a soap stick works also. Rectal thermometers and a inserting a ginger finger also. The latter is used on my husband.

  2. My hoh just decided that a spanking alone is not getting through to me so I'm receiving my first enema in the morning. I googled this, trying to see what I'm in for. Doesn't sound fun. Now I'm really wishing I would have obeyed after my spanking. Why did the internet have to suggest such an awful punishment.

    1. It is better than mouth soaping, yuck!

  3. I receive maintenance spankings and enemas because I never seem to learn. Afterwards, HOH holds me and I feel so loved. It is also a time for anal sex, which took getting used to, but when thoroughly cleaned out and lubed is actually pleasurable , besides an effective birth control method. I am only 2 years into the life but leaning each time I am corrected.